Shopping Nightmare

Good Lord, I do hate shopping. I went out today to Pier One to buy a small piece for the guest bathroom. So, I decided to go to a few clothing stores in Mooresville to do some clothes shopping. There is a Ross's beside Pier One so I made a last minute decision to pop in there to get started. Have you ever been there?? Man, stuff is super cheap!! I was stocked, it was a bargain bonanza. I was pulling stuff off the racks right and left. I thought this would be my new favorite store. This is where it all started to go down hill and I remembered why I hated shopping. My frustration is a result of...

1. Ladies, I know we've all tried on clothes that are an impossibility to get off by yourself. Particularly dresses or shirts that have to be pulled over your head and are fitted under the boobs. Thus making it pretty narrow to get off. I swear to God, I thought I was going to have to call for the attendant to bring me some scissors. Of course, these things never look good on me, I don't know why I bother. So, I put it on and quickly know it was a dud, then the struggle begins. First, I break a sweat trying to get an arm free. Then I try to yank it off with one arm out and one in. This doesn't seem to be effective. So, I struggle to get the other arm out and then try the classic hockey fight move, yank it off by pulling the back of the shirt. Again, no luck. Now I'm red in the face and getting pretty damn pissed!!! Is it too much to ask for clothes that don't require a second person to assist with the undressing process!! Finally, success!!

Ross...15 items to dressing room, two items purchased.

Second stop, Belk's in Mooresville. More shopping frustrations...

2. Is it too much to ask that the petite department not be for grandma's only?!?!? I think of myself as an average size woman. Why is it that every pair of none petite pants are so freaking long!! I'd be walking on my pants if I bought them. And I'm sure as hell not paying to have them altered. That's crazy. So, it's off to the petite department I go. And it is filled with pants with elastic waistbands. Good Lord. I recently bought two pairs of Levi's jeans, petite size, because...see above about pants length. Well, I don't know what's worse, too long or too short. These stupid pants are so short I'll be well prepared for any floods!! I look like a total dork.

3. I think it should be the law of the land that all sizes are the same no matter what brand. Why is it that I'm a size 2 in one brand (yeah right, that's accurate) and a size 4 or 6 in others. It makes it a guessing game to pick out clothes. I don't need the maker to make the sizes bigger to make me feel better about myself. I need them to all be the same to make my shopping experience quicker.

4. All clothes should be pre-matched (with shoes) for your shopping convenience. I have no fashion sense, so this would really be helpful and would alleviate all stress associated with finding a skirt I like but no shirt to match. Then the internal debate begins, to buy or not to buy. Will I be able to find a suitable top to go with the skirt??

5. Have you seen these sweater things, I don't know what they are called, cardigans, I guess. They have one button at the top and a three quarters or short length sleeve, see example below.

This complaint could really be a continuation of number 4. These things were everywhere and it was the most frustrating piece of clothing I've ever come across. Like I said, they were everywhere, but with no matching shirt, or example, of what should be worn underneath. My gosh, you'd think that would be a no brainer. I mean, something MUST be worn underneath it, so why not put it on the same rack. I looked and struggled forever for something to buy to wear underneath one of these things. I finally found something...don't think it was really meant to be worn in this manner, but whatever.

I could go on...

My shopping spree took 3 hours. I went to Ross's, Belk's, Kohl's, and back to Belk's. I think I finally came out with some decent clothes. But I think I shed a year off of my life as a result of stress. I of course had to console myself with my favorite shopping treat...Cheerwine Float from Cookout!! Awe, that made it all better!